The Last Day of 2007

Why does this time of year promote such reflection? Is it because there is time around the holidays to think? Having time off from the day-to-day stuff? Is it because of the sentimentality of Christmas, the Christ Child? I wonder.

It seems we always think about our lives and think about doing something different. The whole “New Years Resolution” thing. I mean, you have to actually think about that. You can’t just pull it out of a hat. And many do. I guess that is why people fail at diets; new exercise regimes and all the traditional things people start anew each year.

I’m not sure whether I have a resolution this year. I haven’t had one for many years. I’m also not sure if it is necessary to have one, but I know, I am thinking a lot this year.

Happy New Year!

The Saga of Ronny Comes to a Close

Well, Ronny got out of jail last month. It’s kind of interesting (Ronny and I are no longer friends) my perception of Ronny was that he wanted to get his life together, he just had this jail time to do, and then he would. What really he wanted was to continue to live the same kind of life, pilfering this and that, not working, but doing little things here and there, living with anyone who had a sofa and would let him and continue his lifestyle of drugs and robbery. It’s too bad. I can see that without a strong parental figure in someone’s life they have no clue of what they should be. I mean, he has 5 brothers and sisters with three fathers. Mom married a shyster insurance person 20 years ago and he screwed the kids up. Can you imagine a stepfather saying, “I married your mother, not you kids.”

The guy is kind of a grifter. Packing the kids in the car and dragging them to church asking for handouts. Moreover, a different church each Sunday. Therefore, Ronny’s sense of growing up is exactly what he is doing. Going around looking for handout’s day to day, not really taking life seriously or growing up.

After he was released, I tried to be a good example for him, but when I found that he was just abusing my friendship, nickel and dining me to death, I gave up. You can’t change people, I know. I guess he did a good job of convincing me he wanted something he didn’t.

Therefore, here I am, once again, with my friends numbered.

It's almost my birthday

It's been a long hard Spring, Summer and partial Fall...

Well, I go to pick up Ronny in two weeks. Yup, his time is up. Finally. I hope he learned something. I'm not sure what, but I hope he learned. I think he spent much of the time sleeping from what I gathered in our last conversation. I would have chosen to read everything I could get my hands on and write. But that's the choice I would have made and I cannot disrespect him for doing it the way he did.

In the meantime, I'll be happy to have my friend back. At least for awhile!

One Friend at a time

An update on "Ronny". He has served 6 1/2 months of his one year (reduced to 8 months) sentence. I guess he finally showed up.

Time flies --- I didn't even miss my one friend.

Stoli & I

I Am Changing

Look at me, Look at me
I am changing
Trying every way I can
I am changing
I'll be better than I am
I'm trying to find a way to understand
But I need you, I need you
I need a hand
I am changing
Seeing everything so clear
I am changing
I'm gonna start right now, right here
I'm hoping to work it out
And I know that I can
But I need you, I need a hand

All of my life I've been a fool
Who said I can do it on my own
How many good friends have I already lost?
How many dog nights have I known?
Walking down that wrong road
There was nothing I could find
All those years of darkness
Looking for some light
But now I can see

I am changing
Trying every way I can
I am changing
I'll be better than I am
But I need a friend
To help me start all over again
That would be just fine
I know it's gonna work out this time
'Cause this time I am
This time I am
I am changing
I'll get my life together now
I am changing
Yes I know how
I'm gonna start again
I'm gonna leave my past behind
I'll change my life
I'll make a vow and nothings gonna stop me now

from the Tony Winning Broadway Musical, "Dreamgirls"
Music by Henry Krieger, Book & Lyrics by Tom Eyen